I'm just so scared about the surgery. I went and had a pre-op visit and they just did alot of talking to me about stuff and naturally it's of all the bad things that can happen.
I would normally write that stuff off as nothing but the fact that I have a cyst in the first place is still amazing me and I just feel like everything that can go wrong - goes wrong for me!
It became VERY surreal that the baby may not take to this surgery at all & I have spent the last 5 hours crying. The doctor made the comment "The uterus doesn't like to be touched so we are going to put you in labor & delivery after the surgery to monitor the contractions." The baby isn't viable yet - So if anything happens that's it.
I just love this baby so much already and I can't detach myself from him in case something were to go wrong...the unthinkable.
I'm just so scared. I wasn't scared until today. I thought I could totally deal with this but I can't.
The doctor waited until today to tell me that she is probably going to remove my ovary. Yes I'll still be able to have kids later but she's pretty sure that the ovary and tube are going bye-bye. That was the start of all the bad news.
I also know that my doctor is very pessimistic and she likes to think the worst of every situation and get you prepared for anything that could go wrong but this is just terrible news. I'm having a hard time accepting the fact that the baby's earth is going to be rattled and there is nothing that I can do about it.
Everyone please keep the baby in your thoughts tomorrow morning. I don't care about me I just want the baby to be ok.
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